2 days ago, a friend of mine called me up. I had to be her CT during practicum. The first question she asked me was, what did I say to my HOD about her? Coz she got C for her practicum. From there I know she somehow blamed me for it.
I told her that what I had informed my HOD was the same thing that I said to her during evaluation. Her weakness, class management as well as professionalism. Yes, I am her friend...but I have to be objective about my evaluation. To me, whateva task I am asked to do, I have to do it well and with integrity. Doesnt mean that we have personal acquaintances I have to give u an A.
She was not satisfied at why she got a C. She said she worked hard for it. At home she always never sleep to finish her lesson plans. Hey...at home, that's personal....u are just evaluated IN SCHOOL. Furthermore, not only you who put in effort like that...I guess all other practicum teachers have been in ur shoes. So? U r not only evaluated based solely on observation. Its a holistic thingy. Ur attitude, ur professionalism...EVERYTHING.
Actually, she should be grateful that she actually got a pass. She would have gotten an F because of what she did in 3NA. She threw a chair towards the class because they were so noisy and it actually almost hit a student. This student complained to the HOD. That would be a direct failure. Especially if the students complained to her parents or report to MOE.
In terms of contribution to school, as compared to her 1st practicum last year, it was not as much. If last year she would involve herself in activities relating to school and department, now...she's just doing the minimum. So how to give an A??? Or even a B??? Because a C means you have done ur minimum, a B something more and an A...outstanding performance. Maybe I guess she was not told wat these grades mean.
I also got to know that last year, what my HOD said to her, about her Sup wanted to give her an F but our side tried to talked him out of it, was actually true. He said she was the worst amongst his other trainees. And her Sup this year also said that she was weaker than her other frens. She didnt know this. I didnt want to tell her coz as a friend I dun wanna break her heart.
Although she claimed that she will put the past behind, I think she harbours that unsatisfaction forever. And I find it sad. As a fren I am sad for her coz she couldnt see it from another perspective. I pity her. If she cant handle the truth now, how later?
To her, I wish her all the best in her new school. I hope that 1 day, she will reflect and realise that wat we did was right and not because we wanna bring her down. From my experience, being a full fledged teacher was a drastic change from a world of fantasy to a world of reality. Wat we got for our practicum doesnt matter a bit. People look at what u r now...how u perform now. It doesnt even determine our pay. So I hope she wun dwell on it.
To u my fren, I really hope for the best for u. Watever feelings u have against me, conscious or unconsciously, hope it will change. As a professional, I have to be objective and carry my task with integrity. As a fren, I want the best for you.
